========================================== The Lure of the Alternanthera, or Clocknapped! An FK/X Files Crossover Story with Halloween Overtones by Nancy Kaminski (c) October 31, 2004 =========================================== NIGHT SHIFT BRIEFING, OCTOBER 25 "And finally," Captain Joe Stonetree announced, "We've got UFOs flying around southern Ontario." The cops in the briefing room snickered, and someone hummed the theme from "The Twilight Zone." Captain Stonetree harrumphed, glared briefly at the musical offender, and continued. "It's coming up on a full moon, people, and that means the loonies are out in force. This apparently includes a couple of teenagers necking near Niagara Falls. It seems that they saw lights moving in the sky---although how they could see anything through the steamed-up windows of their car is beyond me. Anyway, the OPP has asked us to report any mysterious flying objects." He looked at the sheet of paper he was holding. "The way this is phrased, I don't think they're expecting---or wanting---any reports. Let's not get goofy just because we're coming up on Halloween. I don't want the evening flight to Halifax or some civilian in an ultralight getting chased by the Air Force." He paused. "However, if you do see any of those little gray guys, ask 'em to fly their saucer to the States. They seem to like that sort of stuff down there. Dismissed." As they stood up and filed back to their desks, Schanke nudged Nick and said, "Yeah, right, flying saucers! What a load of hooey!" He looked at his partner. "Don't tell me you believe in UFOs, Nick. I know you're weird, but that's going too far." "You never know, Schank," Nick replied. "I bet there's lots of stuff out there we don't know about." Schanke rolled his eyes. "Next thing you're gonna tell me you believe in witches, werewolves, and vampires." He snagged his coat from the back of his chair and headed for the door. Nick followed him. "Well, not werewolves," he said to his partner's back. "Huh? Never mind, I'm driving tonight," Schanke announced over his shoulder. "I don't want to be the passenger in any car you're driving, not if you're going to be staring at the sky looking for blinkie lights instead of watching where you're going. Not that that would be any different than usual," he added under his breath. Nick snorted, but started thinking about UFOs. He'd always wanted to see one. Maybe a field trip was in order. FBI BUILDING, WASHINGTON DC, 3 PM, OCTOBER 25 "Scully, pack your bag. We're going to Niagara Falls." Agent Dana Scully raised her eyebrow. "This is so sudden, Mulder. I had no idea you felt that way about me." The lanky FBI agent grinned and leaned precariously back in his battered office chair. "No, Scully, as much as I'd love to see you lounging around naked in a heart-shaped hot tub, this is business. There's been UFO sightings over Niagara." Scully sighed. "Okay, tell me about it." Agent Fox Mulder leaned forward and picked up a piece of paper from his cluttered desk. "The OPP---that's the Ontario Provincial Police---reported sightings around Niagara Falls last night. Some necking teenagers got the crap scared out of them by lights in the sky that swooped around overhead. The first cop they found was a highway patrolman, so the OPP's got it, not the RCMP like I'd have expected." "Oh, come on, Mulder. You can't take this seriously. What makes this any different than the thousands of other reported sightings we hear about?" "Look what's around that area, Scully. There's Niagara Falls for starters. That's surely a natural landmark that would be noted by EBEs. And then there's the hydroelectric plant, one of the biggest in the country. The power signature it puts out could well attract alien attention." "But that's in Canada," Scully pointed out. "Not exactly our jurisdiction." "The border isn't painted on the ground, Scully. I don't think that matters to the aliens. Anyway, I touched base with the Lone Gunmen, and they said there have been rumblings from the American ufology network about this one, so it's a legit investigation." Scully sighed again. "As legit as an X File can be, that is. Okay, when do we leave?" "We're on a flight to Buffalo in two hours." Mulder held up the plane tickets. "Just in case the ambiance of the Falls overcomes you, would you mind packing something black and lacy?" Scully threw her alien paperweight at him in reply. NICK'S LOFT, 1 PM, OCTOBER 26 Nick dialed Natalie Lambert's home phone number. After five rings, Natalie's sleepy voice sounded in his ear. "Yeah?" "Hi, Nat. Did I wake you?" He heard a groan. "Nick, it's one in the afternoon! I worked until six this morning and didn't get to bed until eight. Give a girl a break!" Nick said contritely, "Sorry. I guess I got up early today---I've got a lot of laundry to do. Anyway, you're off tonight, right? Want to go to Niagara Falls with me?" Natalie was fully awake now. "Niagara? What on earth for?" "Well, the moon's full, and the leaves have turned, and the Falls are always lovely, and I thought you might enjoy seeing them." "Nick, not that I suspect you of ulterior motives---no, wait, I do suspect you of ulterior motives. What else is going on down there?" "Hey, can't a guy ask a girl out for a nice moonlight drive?" Nick protested. 'Of course he can, except that this particular guy isn't in the habit of doing so, at least not with this particular girl. I'm not complaining, mind you, I like a moonlight drive as well as the next girl, but I'm a scientist---I ask questions. Can't help it." Nick grinned into the phone. "Okay, you found me out. I do have an ulterior motive. There have been UFO sightings down there. I wanted to go look, and I thought you might want to join in the fun. The moonlight is just a bonus." Natalie exclaimed, "Ooooh, a flying saucer hunt! When should I be ready? Should I bring my big flashlight?" "I'll come by at seven. Bring your flashlight, by all means. Maybe if we see a UFO you can flag it down," Nick replied. "Okey-dokey. See you then!" NIAGARA FALLS, ONTARIO, 9 PM, OCTOBER 26 Nick turned the Caddy's engine off. As the big engine muttered into silence, Nat turned to him and asked, "Okay, we're here. Now what?" Nick surveyed the almost-empty Niagara Falls Visitor Center's parking lot, then shrugged. "Let's go over to the Falls. We can enjoy the view and keep an eye out for mysterious lights at the same time. Unless you have a better plan. I'm open to suggestions." "No, that works for me." Nat slid out of the car and then shouldered her purse. It was a large canvas satchel, and a long cylindrical object was clearly outlined against its side. "I've got to ask you---have you ever seen a UFO? I mean, you've been flying around at night for almost eight hundred years. If anyone could have had the chance to see something, it would be you." "Well..." Nick locked the car and started walking towards the promenade that ran next to the Niagara River. "I can't say I've actually seen anything I'd class as a UFO. I've seen moving lights in the sky, but they usually turned out to be swamp gas, weather balloons, or other vampires playing jokes on mortal populations. You know, carrying lanterns and flying over graveyards and swamps, that sort of thing. It can be fun, especially around Halloween. If you think that sort of thing is funny," he added hastily. "I never did." "Uh-huh, I believe you," Nat said earnestly. "I really do." She snickered quietly. The roar of the Falls grew louder and they walked down the sidewalk. The foaming water gleamed whitely in the moonlight. "Geeze, this is really pretty," Nat sighed. She leaned on the wall bordering the sidewalk and looked at the ghostly white water rushing over the edge of the Falls, just feet away. "It's really awe-inspiring, all that power and force." "You should see it from the bottom," Nick replied, leaning precariously over the wall and peering into the gorge. "If the moon weren't so bright I'd take you down there. It's too obvious now, with all this light. I've been a lot closer than the Maid of the Mists ever gets." "Some other time, Nick." She grabbed his jacket and pulled him away from the edge. "I know you can't drown, but please don't fall into the river! You might lose the car keys, and then where'd I be? They didn't teach me hotwiring in med school." She pointed to the sky. "We're supposed to be looking upwards, not downwards." "Yes, ma'am." Nick straightened up and started walking down the sidewalk. "I suppose we could just take a walk along here, and see what we can see. The reports weren't real specific about where the kids saw the UFO. They just said it was around the Falls." "Sounds like a plan," Nat agreed, and, tucking her arm through his, started strolling down the walk. NIAGARA FALLS, ONTARIO, 9:10 PM, OCTOBER 26 As Fox Mulder drove the rented Taurus into the Niagara Falls Visitor Center's parking lot, Scully asked, "Well, now that we're here, what's your plan?" She looked around with a scowl. "I don't like it that we're in Canada, Mulder. You know we don't have any business being here." "The UFO was on this side of the border, Scully. Besides, the Falls are much prettier from the Canadian side." He got out of the car and stretched, his black raincoat flapping in the night breeze. "We're just looking around. It's not like we're going to try to arrest anyone." "Good thing, too, since we left our guns and handcuffs in the hotel safe." "We don't want to stretch the professional courtesy thing. We'll just have to protect ourselves with our native wit and the fruits of the Bureau's martial arts training program." "In that case, we're doomed." Scully looked around the parking lot. "Wow, get a load of that classic Caddy over there! My dad bought one of those in the early Sixties, and he kept it for years." She went over to it and peered in the window. "Looks just like his," she announced. "He said he got it for the trunk space, would you believe it? Mom always overpacked when we went on family vacations, and she always managed to fill the trunk with stuff." Her face softened as she thought back to happier times, when her father was home on shore leave and they could all be together like a family should be. But Mulder was already heading off across the parkway that separated the parking lot from the river promenade, and didn't hear Scully's reminiscences. "C'mon, Scully!" he called. "Time's a-wasting!" Scully took one more look at the old car, then pulled herself back into the present. "Coming," she called, and hurried after her partner. When she caught up with him, she asked, "As long as we're here, do you want to interview the teenagers who made the sighting?" Mulder leaned precariously over the wall to peer into the misty, roaring gorge. "Nah," he answered, "the report had all the classic elements of a UFO sighting---an oval object in the sky that darted around and moved unlike anything manmade. Red and blue lights on the rim. Humming noises. I don't think we'd learn anything useful from them." "Except maybe exactly where they saw it?" Scully said. "That report was less than specific." Mulder waved his arm at the sky. "It was around here," he said. "Okay, maybe about a half mile up the parkway in a dark little parking lot overlooking the gorge. We'd be able to see the UFO here just as well, and besides, the scenery's nice." Scully sighed. She hated going on wild UFO chases, and this one had less to go on than most of the sightings they received. "Let's at least walk down that way," she gestured, "and get some exercise out of this. I don't want the evening to be a complete waste of time." "An evening spent UFO hunting is never wasted, Scully, you know that," Mulder answered equably. "You need to get out more, Mulder. Let's go." The pair of FBI agents started off down the sidewalk, the Niagara River roaring on their right. A fine mist thrown up from the water rushing over the precipice of the Falls filled the air and dampened Scully's face. "At least," she reflected resignedly to herself, brushing droplets off her face, "this will do wonders for my complexion---if not my disposition." SOMEWHERE ALONG THE NIAGARA FALLS WALKWAY, 11:00 PM "How long are we going to watch for UFOs, Nick?" Natalie inquired. "Getting bored already?" Nick looked at his watch. "We've been at it only a couple of hours." "No, I'm not bored. It's just so, um, open-ended. Staring at the sky and hoping for a UFO, I mean. I don't think I'd have the patience to do this on a regular basis." Natalie hugged herself. "And I'm getting cold. I should have worn my Polarfleece jacket." Nick took off his own leather jacket and draped it over Natalie's shoulders. "Here, it's not like I need it. Do you want to head back to the car and do our viewing from there? I could put the top down and turn the heater way up. And I have a blanket in the trunk." Natalie shook her head. "No, I don't want to ruin your fun." She settled Nick's jacket more securely around her. "This is fine." Nick put his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels, looking at the sky. "It's really a nice night...whoa, what was that?!?" Natalie had the impression of a blur of white light flashing across the sky. She pointed excitedly. "Look! It's coming back!" The blur flashed past in the opposite direction, reversed itself, then zigzagged. It was hard to tell how high it was, or how far away, but it definitely staying in the vicinity. It zoomed over the Falls, hesitated a moment, then headed downriver. Nick and Natalie stood watching, mouths open in amazement. Then Natalie exclaimed "Ooof!" when Nick grabbed her around the waist. "We're taking the shortcut back to the car!" he said, and then leaped into the air. For breathless seconds Natalie felt the air rushing through her hair, saw lights and buildings tilt crazily underneath her, and then was set not-so-gently on her feet next to the Caddy. "C'mon, let's go!" Nick called as he leaped over the car's roof and grabbed at the driver's side door handle. "Damn! Keys!" Natalie fumbled in the pockets of Nick's leather jacket, which by some miracle was still slung over her shoulders. "Here!" she called, and threw the keys over the roof of the car. Nick caught them neatly, unlocked the door, and slid in. Hastily he unlocked the passenger door for Natalie, then started the engine. Natalie had barely closed her door when the Caddy sped out of the parking lot in a spray of gravel. Only Natalie noticed the two people in black raincoats who ran through the spitting gravel towards an anonymous sedan further down the parking lot. SOMEWHERE ALONG THE NIAGARA FALLS WALKWAY, 11:05 PM. OCTOBER 26 "Mulder, we need a plan. We can't just wander aimlessly around Niagara Falls waiting for a UFO to drop out of the sky." Agent Scully stopped, crossed her arms and waited patiently for her partner to reply. Mulder continued walking a few paces, then stopped and turned his attention from the night sky to her. "Oh, I don't know. That seems as reasonable as anything I can come up with," he replied. His eyes drifted irresistibly skyward while he waited for Scully to try to reason with him. He was used to ignoring her, but he was always polite about it. Suddenly a light blurred past overhead. "Whoa! Did you see that, Scully?" Mulder exclaimed, pointing. "A classic ovoid with Type Two light sequencing!" He was almost hopping up and down in excitement as he tracked the object back and forth across the sky. It was only when it started drifting downriver that he turned and sprinted back up the promenade. "C'mon! We've gotta chase it!" Scully ran after him. As they both pounded across the parking lot to the rented Taurus, the FBI agents had to dodge to get out of the way of the gravel kicked up by the departing Caddy that Scully had been admiring just a short time before. NIAGARA PARKWAY, 11:15 PM, OCTOBER 26 The Caddy sped recklessly down the dark, tree-lined parkway. "Keep your eyes on it!" Nick urged Natalie, as he muscled the big car around a bend much faster than the posted 50 kph speed limit. Fortunately there wasn't much traffic at that time of night, and this particular part of the parkway was deserted. "It's staying ahead of us," Natalie said excitedly, her head stuck out of the window looking upward at the sky. "Keep going this way!" She pointed forward. The Caddy barreled down the picturesque two-lane road, its headlights carving a path through the dark, the river on the right, parkland on the left. The light in the sky was still zigzagging back and forth, but it seemed to be zeroing in on one spot. "Turn here! Left, left, left!" Natalie yelled, drawing her head back into the car just in time to avoid clonking it on the window frame as Nick yanked the huge car, tires screeching, left into a small parking lot. The tires screeched again as he stomped on the brakes, stopping the behemoth just in time to avoid running over a grassy divider edged with a high curb. They flung open their respective car doors and leaped out to see their quarry hovering silently about five hundred feet above their heads. "Wow," Natalie breathed, too amazed to be frightened. "That is sooooo kewl Why didn't I bring my camera?!" Nick murmured, his eyes on the glowing disk, "Maybe if I just flew up there..." but Natalie grabbed his arm. "No, you don't!" Her protest was interrupted by the arrival of another car. A dark blue Taurus screeched into the parking lot, not unlike the Caddy had just a minute before. "Witnesses," Nat hissed in his ear, glad for a reasonable excuse to keep Nick from demonstrating his flying abilities again. "No flying!" They both tore their eyes away from the UFO to look at the new arrivals. A man and woman, each wearing a black raincoat and sober business attire, leaped out of the car and ran over to where Nick and Natalie were standing. "What's it been doing?" the tall, gangly man demanded, peering upward. "Nothing, just hovering," Nick replied, his attention returning to the UFO above. "Where exactly are we?" the red-haired woman asked her companion, then she spied the Caddy. "Hey, weren't you two just at the Falls?" she asked, turning to Nick and Natalie. "Yeah, we're chasing UFOs tonight," Natalie answered brightly. She looked over at the newcomers. "And weren't you two the people we just about ran over? I recognize the raincoats. Uh, sorry about that," she added apologetically. "S'all right," Scully answered. "We're sort of used to it." She produced her badge. "Agents Scully and Mulder, FBI," she announced. "We're chasing UFOs, too," she added matter-of-factly. "What's the FBI doing in Canada?" Natalie asked, her eyes glued to the UFO. It felt unreal to be carrying on a conversation while watching a flying saucer hover over her head. "It's a long story," Scully began, but just then an intense beam of white light shot down from the bottom of the UFO to illuminate the ground. The four UFO hunters threw up their arms to shield their eyes from the brilliant light. It was centered on a circular garden that was curiously tilted at about a forty-five degree angle. "What IS that?" chorused the two FBI agents, squinting their eyes to try to make sense of what they saw. "It's the Floral Clock," Nick answered cryptically. The tilted garden was, indeed, an enormous clock at least forty feet across. It had metal hands that told them it was now 11:20. The face of the clock was an elaborately planted garden, concentric circles and patterns of variously hued, low-growing plants. A paved path led directly to the number six, which was formed from a yellowish plant against a contrasting dark purple plant background. "It's a big tourist attraction," added Nat. "Galactic, I'd say," Mulder said drily. A low-pitched humming noise filled the air, and an even more intense beam of light shot down from the UFO. When Nick involuntarily gasped and covered his eyes, Natalie fumbled in the pockets of his jacket, located his ever-present pair of sunglasses, and pressed them into his hands. "Thanks," he gasped, and put them on to shield his sensitive eyes from the blinding brightness. The noise increased in volume, making them all clap their hands over their ears. The light was so bright that it leached the color from the landscape until it looked like an overexposed photograph, all white and shades of gray. Out of the whiteness three shadowy figures appeared. The light was so bright that Nat couldn't make out anything more than the barest outlines---they were short, almost childlike in appearance, with heads that were large and out of proportion to their bodies. They looked just like the cover illustration from a cheap alien abduction novel, in fact. "Let's get back!" Scully shouted over the humming. "Back, back!" She tried to turn and run, but found that she couldn't move. She and her companions were frozen in place, pinned by the sound and the light. The three figures advanced until they stood not ten feet from the four humans. A disembodied voice echoed in their heads. "Why did you summon us?" The words made no sense. Summoned? It was Mulder who finally was able to make a response. "We didn't summon you! Why are you here? What do you want?" he shouted into the light and noise. The three aliens made agitated gestures and seemed to talk among themselves. Then they became still again. Their huge black eyes, barely perceptible through the glare, stared unblinkingly at the humans. Natalie gasped as images streamed through her mind. There were no words, just fleeting impressions of colors and shapes. Even though they were crazily distorted and skewed, she realized they were all of the Floral Clock, a chronicle of the garden as it changed from year to year. The patterns and colors melted from one to another; the clock's hands swept around and around at dizzying speed, and ant-like people zoomed in and out of buses and cars, circled the clock, and left. Just as suddenly as they started, the images ceased. When Natalie was able to think clearly again, she saw that the aliens were gone, although the UFO still hovered above and the light was still just as intense. As she watched it decreased in diameter until it only encompassed the Floral Clock. The noise rose to a fever pitch, and before their astonished eyes, the Floral Clock vanished. There was no smoke, no flash, no nothing---one moment it was there, its sweep hand moving placidly around the dial like it had since 1950, and then it was gone. For a moment, the light showed them a circle of black earth, and then it blinked out and the humming noise ceased. The UFO shot straight upward, became a pinpoint of light, and then disappeared. The silence was deafening. "Wow," breathed Natalie. "Ow," Nick said, clutching his head. "Ow." "They took the Floral Clock," Mulder said, stating the obvious. "It's an alien clocknapping!" Natalie exclaimed, and then laughed. The other three looked at her. "Sorry," she mumbled. "Reaction." Scully reached into a pocket and pulled out a flashlight. She clicked it on and shone the light on the bare earth where the clock used to be. The moist loam seemed to be smoking slightly. "Look at the edge! It's like it was cut out with a laser." Natalie fished her own flashlight out of her purse. "See, I told you it would come in handy," she said to Nick. She joined the FBI agents and started poking around the bare earth. Mulder straightened up after carefully taking a sample of soil. "Did everyone hear what I heard? That they wanted to know why we had summoned them? And then all the images of the garden?" Nat and Scully nodded, but Nick looked away and cleared his throat. "Um, I didn't hear anything like that. Just that humming noise." His eyes met Natalie's briefly. "And now I have a really bad headache." "Aha," Natalie thought. "He did get some sort of message, but it's not for public consumption." She made a mental note to follow up on the subject later, when they were alone. "They were communicating with us telepathically." Mulder explained, looking at Nick with interest. "You didn't get any of it? I wonder why not, if we three did. Would you mind if we did some tests?" Nick replied emphatically, "Yes, I'd mind. No tests!" He took out his cell phone. "We better notify the OPP about this, Nat. I'm a cop," he added to the FBI agents. "Metro Toronto Homicide. We were told to be on the lookout for something like this in last night's briefing. Niagara isn't in my jurisdiction, and neither are UFOs or," he looked at Natalie, "clocknappings. But I think I have a little more standing here than the FBI does." "True," Scully agreed. She looked thoughtfully at the bare circle. "What do you suppose they want with the Floral Clock?" She shook her head. "Just saying it sounds ridiculous." Mulder said, "Okay, they said they were summoned, and then they showed us images of the garden, I'm assuming all the different designs through the years. What do we know about the people who design the garden? Has it been the same person from the beginning?" "Wait a minute, Mulder, you aren't thinking that the Niagara Parks Commission landscaping department is in league with Cigarette Smoking Man and your theoretical government alien conspiracy, are you?" Scully protested. "Just think about it, Scully," Mulder warmed to his favorite subject. "What better way to keep in touch without raising any suspicions than to design a large, clearly visible geometric design that is expected to change regularly? There'd be no radio transmissions, nothing to arouse suspicion, just something that everyone expects and that is viewed by thousands of people from all over." He shone his flashlight on the explanatory sign that stood near the path that led to the now-missing clock. "See? This says that the design is changed twice a season! That's almost one hundred possible messages since the clock was built in 1950!" Nick and Natalie exchanged glances. These two were even stranger than some of Nick's acquaintances of the undead persuasion. "I don't think it's a good idea to start throwing around accusations like that," Nick began, but Mulder interrupted him. "They said they were summoned. Obviously someone summoned them, and they took this clock thing, so logically the clock was a message." Mulder looked earnestly at his companions, clearly expecting them to agree with them. A chill settled in his stomach. Mulder...Scully. The names had sounded familiar, and now it all came back to him. Larry Merlin had told him he had had to do some quick computer work because some pesky Americans were getting a little too persistent and a lot too close to some of his undead clients. He mentioned these two, as well as some oddball fanatics called, of all things, the Lone Gunmen. He had to put a stop to this fast. "Well, that's not what I heard," Nick stated. 'You said they didn't say anything to you," Scully said accusingly. "I thought it was silly, so I lied," Nick lied. "They said that they were fascinated with terrestrial horticulture and especially the alternanthera used in this particular garden. I guess they wanted some specimens so they took the whole thing." "The *what*?" Nat asked. "The, um, althernanthera." Nick shot a quick glance at the descriptive text on the sign ten feet away to make sure he got the word right. Yup, althernanthera. Whatever that was. "You're telling us that gray aliens came here from outer space to get plants for their garden?" Scully said disbelievingly. "See? That's why I lied," Nick answered, using his most sincere expression, the one that had gotten him out of many sticky situations, like why he was holding a pretty dead girl with puncture wounds in her neck. "That's ridiculous," Scully stated flatly. "Well, it's just as reasonable as postulating that some guy who works for the Niagara Parks Commission has been sending intergalactic messages with a giant clock garden," Nat said, backing Nick out of loyalty and the intense desire to use the situation as blackmail at a future date. "I'm calling the Niagara PD," Nick said. "We've come across a terrible case of horticultural vandalism. A provincial treasure has been destroyed." "Not the OPP?" Nat asked. "Why would they be interested?" Nick answered. "It's not like there was a UFO or anything like that involved." "Hey, wait, you can't cover this up!" Mulder protested. "We all witnessed something truly remarkable! This was a genuine close encounter!" Nat smiled sweetly. "Gee, I didn't see anything," she said. "I was just out for a moonlight drive with Nick, and when we stopped to look at the Floral Clock, well, it was gone." She shook her head sorrowfully. "It's really a shame." "But, but..." Mulder sputtered. "C'mon, Mulder," Scully hissed, tugging at his sleeve. "It's over, we're screwed. We're in Canada, remember? We're not authorized to investigate anything here. If this gets back to Skinner, both of our hides will be nailed to his door and used for dart boards." "I'm dialing now," Nick said. "You might want to head back to the border, just in case we remember there were some other potential witnesses to this dastardly crime." He punched a few numbers into his phone, then looked at the FBI agents with a raised eyebrow. "We're going," Mulder said bitterly. "But just remember, they saw you, too. And they have a habit of abducting more than plants. I'd be careful if I were you." He headed back to the Taurus. "C'mon, Scully, let's get out of here." Nick and Nat watched the agents drive away in silence. Finally, Nat asked, "Are you really going to call the Niagara PD?" Nick put his phone back in his pocket. "Nah. They'll find out about this soon enough. I don't' think I want to get involved." "And I don't want everyone to know I was taking a moonlight drive with you to romantic Niagara Falls," Nat said feelingly. "It's hard enough to maintain the 'we're just friends' image without adding this to the pot." "I think my feelings should be hurt by that statement," Nick said with a grin, "but I know exactly what you mean. Schanke would be insufferable for at least a month, and Myra would have the wedding invitations picked out." "So, should we go home?" Nat said, looking one last time at the smoking hole that formerly housed the Floral Clock. "I guess so. I finally saw a flying saucer, so the night was a success," Nick said, opening his car door. "It was pretty amazing, wasn't it?" Nat commented, settling in the passenger seat. Nick started the engine and drove sedately down the parkway back to the Falls. "It was one of the strangest experiences I've had in all my years," Nick answered. "And that's saying a lot." Natalie suddenly remembered Nick's denial of a telepathic message. "Say, did the aliens say something to you that made you clam up? I got the impression you got a personalized message." Nick cleared his throat embarrassedly. "Well, sort of. It was pretty short." "Well? Give!" "It was insulting, actually. One of them looked right at me and said, 'We don't deal with dead things. Go away.'" "Ow. That hurts." "So I guess I don't have to worry about being abducted. I don't fit the criteria." Nat reached over and patted his arm. "I've got some new ideas along those lines, by the way. So maybe you'll get your chance at being an abduction candidate some day." Nick slanted a glance at her. "New protein shakes?" "Of course. With new, improved mystery ingredients guaranteed to raise the temperature, increase the pulse, and give you a rosy glow." Nick groaned theatrically. "That's it, I'm planting a floral clock on the roof of the loft. Maybe they'll come back and rescue me." "Ingrate!" "Mad scientist!" "Mortal wannabe!" "Vampire groupie!" "Um," Nat was stumped for a second. "Male model reject! Where *did* you get that awful bright blue jacket, anyway?" "Janette picked it out for me," Nick protested. "What did you do to piss her off that much?" Nick sighed. "So I've been insulted by aliens, my doctor, and probably by Janette. Another perfect day." "But you saw a flying saucer," Nat reminded him. "And so did I. It was wonderful." He smiled. "Yeah, I saw a flying saucer. And little gray people from another planet. It *was* a perfect day." Nat said, "And I've got a great idea for a costume for the Halloween party." "Let me guess---an alien?" "Of course not!" Nat framed her face with her hands and tilted her head coquettishly. "The Floral Clock!" FINIS